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Gamer Love

I’ve had my gorgeous R2D2 limited edition Xbox (my pride and joy) for a couple of years now but I’ve been shamefully neglecting it and using it only for Netflix and Call of Duty up until this year. Don’t get me wrong, that’s a hell of a lot of use given the number of films and tv shows I watch and how I can now sniper the shit out of anyone, but it’s kind of like buying a gaming PC to play solitaire.

I’ve broadened my horizons in a big way since then and started to play anything I can get my hands on. The top 4, in no particular order have got to be:

  1. Lego Games

    I have all of them to-date, not including the Hobbit. These are absolutely ideal for any amateur or lighthearted gamer who likes easy and familiar storyline, puzzles, shiny things and smashing the crap out of things that make a satisfying breaking noise.

    If you get stuck and can’t be bothered figuring it out, there are tons of walkthroughs available online. I’ve had some shtick from my hardcore gamer friends for this one, as it’s a ‘kids and girls game’, these people are no longer on my christmas card list as they’re asshats- screw you guys, these games are amazing and you know you play them when your wives and kids have gone to bed!

    The cut scene videos are hilarious and are a wonderful opportunity to stuff your face with pic’n’mix while you’re playing.

  2. Tomb Raider

    This one comes with some mega pros and cons.

    The pros are:
    – It is absolutely gorgeous, they’ve put a lot of hard work and love into the design of this game and it pays off, particularly now Lara’s boobs aren’t rectangular and she doesn’t keep disappearing into walls.
    – It doesn’t matter how crap you are at shooting things, the baddies keep saying things like ‘Oh my god! She’s such a good shot! She’s killing us!’. It’s an awesome ego boost even if it is a condescending lie! You take what you can get…You do need a decent sized tv screen to enjoy this one properly though, I was playing it across the room from a 19″ screen so it’s little wonder I was a crap shot (so I keep telling myself anyways).

    The cons:
    – Why are there wolves everywhere and why are they eating me?
    – Time to admit that I never actually finished this one, largely because of the weeniness of my tv at the time. I did go back to it once, about 2 weeks after a marathon play of it and I found myself up a mountain with an angry, injured Scotsman who wouldn’t tell me what I was meant to be doing and the menus/maps aren’t much fecking use either. Cue RAGE QUIT.

  3. Skyrim

    ¬†You are the Dragonborn! Which means that after you’ve run around running errands and climbing up mountains to talk to old men, you get to shout at dragons and earn your place in the annals of history. Simple but effective.

    The first Bethesda game I ever played. I lost so many hours of my life to this game and I thankfully never bought the expansion packs or I’d still be there now.
    It is so freaking pretty, the map is huge and you’re never ever done with it- I’ll pick it up again in a few weeks time and there will still be missions aplenty to keep me out of trouble in the real world.The main storyline is solid and you can do as I did and get stuck in to the side missions and just wander aimlessly around the countryside looting everything you come across¬† to draw it all out because you don’t want it to end.Plus there are dragons. Dragons are my favourite fantasy creatures of all time because of their high levels of badassery and the myths and legends that surround them. This game did them full justice, none of this Sean Connery in DragonHeart bullshit- these dragons mean business.

  4. Fallout3

    You’re born in an underground bunker during a nuclear apocalypse and one day your dad runs off and leaves you behind so, of course, you run after him to find out what’s going on. It turns out that the world is still out there but is a radioactive wasteland with supermutants, mutated humans and bandits everywhere so you have to get badass fast and shoot your way out of a number of scrapes. You then finish off the game by bringing clean water to the masses, because you’re just that kind of person (even if you’ve been wantonly killing everyone up to this point).

    I adore this game but the only real hitch was that I played Skyrim first, which was created by Bethesda later in the day so the graphics and map were superior, making this one a wee bit disappointing in comparison.The storyline in this one was, if anything, better than Skyrim because it was darker (which I love) and you were given moral choices to make which directly affected the progression of the game.
    The weapon aiming system was glorious for the lazy and uncoordinated among us and you could be as kind or evil as you liked.

    You could also put on the radio and you’d be able to listen to this as you potter about killing mutants and robots, making it very creepy.


    The downside was that it was a hell of a lot harder than Skyrim as you ran out of ammo, got radiation poisoning and could never find enough bottlecaps (post-apocalyptic currency) to buy anything useful. The map was also a bit more limited as you would find a lot of places closed off to you.

So, I’m off to play ‘Fallout New Vegas’ for what’ll probably be the rest of the day now, hope you all enjoy your weekends!


“They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I said I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard” – Fallout New Vegas

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